I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
