why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
