she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I wish there were birth control emojis
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
