ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
