Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
