We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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