I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
