I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
