if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
