It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
