i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
