i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
