Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
