After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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