So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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