I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
