I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
