If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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