I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
