she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
