best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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