i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
