In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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