then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Your cock deserves a montage
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
