Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
