Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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