She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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