Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
