how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
