last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
