he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
