bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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