Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
