On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
