so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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