windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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