Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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