just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
How external is "for external use only"?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
