i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
