It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
