Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
