wat bout pragnant strippers??
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
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