My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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