my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
