My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
