I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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