it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
