my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
