Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize