Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
